The problem with ‘self-help’ gurus…

 

wooden-figures-980774_1920The internet (no, the world!) is full of masses of glib-tongued ‘self-help’ gurus who all want to tell you how to be a better person, a more successful person, a more popular person, a richer person…ya de da de da.

But shall I tell you the truth about these people? They are smooth talking, snake oil sales people. They don’t want to help you, they don’t know you, they don’t give a damn about you- they JUST WANT TO SELL YOU THEIR SHIT…the ebook, the podcast, the Chakra Stones…whatever. And if they can’t sell you anything than they, at least, want your email address so that they can keep on trying to sell you their shit and (two for one) sell that email address on to fellow charlatans who will then try to sell you their shit, as well.

Oooh…did I just say that self-help gurus were charlatans? Well, they are. What they’re doing is telling you to apply some stupid ten-point (you know, 10 Most Effective habits of Total Arseholes, that kind of nonsense) list or some entirely makey-uppy philosophy backed by absolutely zero independent, qualitative research and apply it to your life, whoever you are, where ever you are and, sorry, but real life comes in so many different shapes, sizes, flavours and is so inherently fucking messy that any attempt to apply ‘one size philosophies’ (particularly when the ‘philosophy’ is bogus to start with…) is doomed to failure. In short, there just ain’t no quick cure for the human condition….

You won’t understand the grace, power and beauty of your youth until many years after it has gone.

You’ll fail at some things and consider it failure and not a natural learning process.

You’ll betray those you love, whether by thought or word or deed.

You’ll forget how blessed you are, focusing only on the bad.

You’ll invest time and energy worrying about things that’ll never happen when, in truth, it’s the unexpected stuff that’ll really mess you up.

You’ll compare yourself to others and find yourself wanting. Wrong.

You’ll compare yourself to others and consider yourself better than them. Wrong.

You’ll judge people without having first walked a mile in their shoes.

You’ll waste your life by trying to live that life through the eyes of others, letting their expectations and prejudices prevent you living the life you were meant to live and being the person you were supposed to be.

You won’t understand that you are a unique and beautiful creation, but no more (or less) unique or beautiful than anyone else.

You’ll cross to the other side of the road when you see others who need help, because it’s all too much trouble.

You’ll chase money and sex and drugs and power while real living passes you by.

You’ll never truly understand the pure depth and strength of the transcendent love God gave you when he tore off a piece of himself and placed it inside you, that piece of God being your soul.

You’ll be unsympathetic to the elderly, not realising that you, too, will grow old and weak and sick.

You’ll be impatient with the young, forgetting that you, too, were a child once.

You’ll be unaware that life is short, that every day lived is a day less to live, that every day you do something that you love, is a day less to do the things that you love.

You’ll expect others to behave in a particular way and become angry when they don’t, even though you have no right to impose your expectations on others.

You’ll never have enough. You’ll always want more.

You’ll live your life in the past and the future, but not today.

You’ll be wise and beautiful and kind and loving, but you’ll also be stupid, shallow and willfully cruel.

You’ll forget what you owe and to whom, but talk a lot about what you’re owed.

You won’t see that you’re made of the same stuff as your neighbour, traveling on the same journey and going to the same place; we’re all different but we’re also all the same.

You’ll live your life just as fallible, messed up and human as the next person…that’s the Human Condition.

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